24 cars blue sky: New York 2012: 2013 Mercedes-Benz GL Is The Latest Soccer Mom Chariot

My girlfriend is really excited for tonight's debut of "The Real Housewives of Vancouver", and I bet that the Real Housewives already hankering for a new ride before the 36-month lease on their current GL350 BlueTecs are up. Here's more questionably-built ostentatiousness to satiate their vapid souls.

I do have an affinity for the Mercedes-Benz GL because it can be had with the BlueTec diesel engine – a good number of them (apparently as high as 50 percent in Canada) are sold with the oil burner. I imagine that isn't the case in the United States. The BlueTec 3.0L V6 diesel now makes 240 horsepower and 455 lb-ft.

Two gasoline V8s will also be offered, both 4.6L twin-turbo V8s. The GL450 makes 362 horsepower and 406 lb-ft of torque while the GL550 will make 429 horsepower and 516 lb-ft of torque, the better to get to hot yoga before that bitch in the Range Rover Sport steals your parking spot. A 7-speed automatic puts power to the ground. A radar-based collision avoidance system works at triple digit speeds, so you can yak on your phone without worrying about human life.

The GL350 starts at $62,445, and goes up to $86,175 for the GL550.